Adelaide really is a horrible place.

Why the hell would anyone want to work in Adelaide anyway? It is, by far, the most boring place in all of Australia. At least Canberra has porn!

However, the powers that be have decided that change is a good thing.

---

*yesterday afternoon*


GeneralManager: "Ok, the Adelaide office has 2 people left, and it's costing us $xxxx per month. This is stupid, turn it off!"
PonyGirl: "Ok, I'll disable all remote access to the server, then I'll fly over in a few days for physical disconnection."
GeneralManager: "Do it!"


*this morning*


PonyTail: "Ok, Adelaide's offline, I'm going to play golf, bye!"
Me: "Adelaide cut off from the world, got it!"


*ringring*


AdelaideAdminLady: "Help, I can't get e-mail!"
Me: "Er...yea..."
AdelaideAdminLady: "Why not? Is there something wrong with the server?"
Me: "Um...must be! I'll call you back!" (I certainly didn't want to be the one to tell her that her job is now gone. Why can't people communicate before this kind of thing goes down?)


*after this call, I head off to speak to my bosses*


Me: "So, um, do the Adelaide workers know their office is essentially dead and buried?"
GeneralManager: "Nope, we were going to see how long it took them to notice."
Me: "Er...right. Um, I just had a call from AdelaideAdminLady, and she wants to know why she has no email or not"
iOrgasm: "Meh, lie to her, tell her that you're working on it."
Me: "Really??"
GeneralManager: "Yup!"


*after deceiving AdelaideAdminLady, a few hours pass - I called called into the meeting with GeneralManager and iOrgasm*


iOrgasm: "Well, if we give the Adelaide office just their e-mails and net access, but no access to any other state's files, that should be ok, right?"
GeneralManager: "Sounds good! Let's see how long it takes for them to notice!"
Me: "Um....ok.....I'll try and get access to the server-"
GeneralManager + iOrgasm: "Great! Solved! Don't tell Adelaide anything!"
Me: "............."


*can't get access to Adelaide server, PonyGirl has turned off DHCP, DNS, Exchange, remote access, basically everything, just like he was told, so I have to call him*


Me: "PonyGirl! They want Adelaide back online"
PonyGirl: "WHAT THE FUCK YOU'VE GOT TO BE FUCKING JOKING!"

---

In their defence, it's only Adelaide.

Valentine's Day

So, since it's Valentine's Day, today's lunch was dominated by talk of love, romance, and all the bad things that go with it. It's amazing how girls feed of this gossip.

Today's fresh new face is MidgetGirl. She's not an actual midget, but is rather sensitive about her height (which isn't that short, to be honest, but I tease her relentlessly about it. It is no surprise that I am single).

---

FrazzledMum: "Yea, so, my ex is an asshole, I hate him. Being single is much better."
Me: "Agreed! Freedom is awesome!"
MidgetGirl: "What, you're single?" (she's taken, don't read too much into this)
Me: "Yup, living the dream!"
FrazzledMum: *snort of derision*
Me: "What was that?"
FrazzledMum: "I've seen your Facebook wall, you've got your ex-girlfriend totally in love with you!"
MidgetGirl: "OMG who's what how huh huh?!"

*FrazzledMum explains the entire saga*

FrazzledMum: "So, yea, she posts on his facebook and stalks him!"
MidgetGirl: "Wow, what a bitch. Why the hell did you hook up with her?"
Me: "...There were a couple of reasons."
MidgetGirl: "Oh, tits, I see. Yea, don't go back to the crazy woman, she's called the ex for a reason!! Also, I can't log into the database."
Me: *sigh*

---

My co-workers are awesome when they're not in front of a computer.

Sinner.

It's server pics time!!

This is ServerRack2 in our primary office. Since our secondary office (which houses ServerRack3) no longer has a lease, we're moving ServerRack3 into our primary office. This gives me the chance to clean up years of laziness and bad, bad upkeep.

Apologies for the red flash, these pics were taken on an iPhone.
Double apologies for the cabling :( Blue is for network ports, yellow is for phones, red is for servers....at least, that was the original plan, so long ago.

Now that we've moved some stuff out, we've actually got some space to put ServerRack3 in the server room, when we actually move it. For now...yea. That's our modem for our internet, and our Untangle box. Yes, no UPS, no mounting, no nothing.

If there is an IT Hell, someone's going there. That bottom machine is a file server for all our users nationwide. The top lid had been removed because we forgot what we had installed in it (documentation? HAH), and the front lid was kicked off by the electricians.

This monster was removed from the server room - it was sitting between the two racks. I have no idea what it's original function was, only that it was powered and running for 4 years, and was working fine until we forced open it's door with a hammer.

REACTOR IS CRITICAL

More cabling horrors.

Pretty lights.

Incoming phone lines and stuff. Covers? Pshaw, that's for professionals!

---

I'm posting this now to actually get some content on here, and to show that I am far from perfect myself. While a lot of this was already as-is when I started here, I've not done much to improve it. Idle hands, etc etc.

CapsLockGirl finds an apprentice.

Another day, another new employee to contend with.

Where do they find these people? I wonder if there is some kind of Anti-Computing-Knowledge-Persons club that exists only to torment me, and that my company hires exclusively through them.

Since CapsLockGirl is gone, this new girl is forever known as her replacement, and by the sounds of things, she will live up to her title.

---

CapsLockGirlReplacement: "When I log into my e-mail in the mornings, it comes up with a user/pass prompt." (note: she didn't say this, it was more of a "ugh the internet is asking me for another password I just want to check my mail", real fucking helpful)
Me: "Ok, just type in your use-"
CapsLockGirlReplacement: "Nah, I don't do that, I just escape it away and it goes away! Easy fixed!"
Me: "But you're not auth-"
CapsLockGirlReplacement: "Yea, it still comes up with the little message in the bottom about the password, but I ignore that!"


I think I let out a little sob over the phone. I sort out her problem, but no less than 2 minutes later, she calls again! 


CapsLockGirlReplacement: "I typed it in, and it didn't work!"

Me: "Please tell me what's in the user name field."
CapsLockGirlReplacement: "The box? DomainName\"
Me: "...Yes? \what?"
CapsLockGirlReplacement: "Nothing, that's all"
Me: "..."

---

Maybe it's just a Sydney thing.

Farewell, dear user.

Alas, CapsLockGirl will be leaving the company.

I'm actually a little sad. For all the horrible support calls she inflicted upon me, she was a nice person, and was always apologetic when she called. At least she knew she was annoying, she just couldn't do anything about it.

For this fact alone, she rates higher than quite a few other users in the company, who only expect and demand things. If they learned some basic manners, I'm sure they'd achieve so much more in life, let alone IT support.

Farewell, CapsLockGirl. Of all the users I had, you were the most...most.

I had it coming.

Today's retard story, care of......me.

---

PonyGirl: "See that mobo over there with the heatsink, RAM, etc already in it? Build a machine from it!"
Me: "Roger!"

*cue an hour of pain troubleshooting this fucking thing which won't boot*

Me: "It's not working! I'm going to re-seat the HSF......hey, where's the CPU?"
PonyGirl: "Oh, yea, you'll need one of those"
Me: "...so we're both retarded?"

---

We are :(